Grief. It is interesting because it's so dynamic and I find that I reflect a lot on the many lessons learned from the life and death of the important person (or in my case this time, doggie). While it's not fun, it is a necessary part of life and one that is so deeply moving.
Still missing my pup, but I know she is feeling better and her soul is, as my mini-me told me, "waiting to find the body of a new puppy to jump in to." Love you Millie girl.
Friday, January 24, 2014
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
My puppy girl, Millie. She was the epitome of unconditional love until the bittersweet end despite her many health issues. An email to my co-workers follows, posted here so I will not forget. May her soul be resting wherever she may be...
"Well, we took her in and she had lost another two pounds since Friday. Vet indicated that we could repeat the blood work and head in to a more aggressive treatment plan, but that may still have her in the horrible condition she was in within a couple of months. She was dehydrated too which, for a dog with kidney disease, is a huge problem as drinking extra fluids is the way they regulate themselves. Wasn't herself at all. She was pretty much catatonic all the way up to the point Mike came in to say his goodbyes and damn if she didn't stand up and wag her tail! I am glad she was able to say goodbye to me, Jayson, and Mike. Mike and I stayed with her until the end. We were both a mess. Jayson was too, but he didn't want to remember her lifeless... his last memory is her wagging her tail at all of us. I'm still pretty much beside myself but I know it'll get better in time. She is resting and no longer in pain and/or feeling badly."
Millie Senko: 9/28/02 - 1/21/14
"Well, we took her in and she had lost another two pounds since Friday. Vet indicated that we could repeat the blood work and head in to a more aggressive treatment plan, but that may still have her in the horrible condition she was in within a couple of months. She was dehydrated too which, for a dog with kidney disease, is a huge problem as drinking extra fluids is the way they regulate themselves. Wasn't herself at all. She was pretty much catatonic all the way up to the point Mike came in to say his goodbyes and damn if she didn't stand up and wag her tail! I am glad she was able to say goodbye to me, Jayson, and Mike. Mike and I stayed with her until the end. We were both a mess. Jayson was too, but he didn't want to remember her lifeless... his last memory is her wagging her tail at all of us. I'm still pretty much beside myself but I know it'll get better in time. She is resting and no longer in pain and/or feeling badly."
Millie Senko: 9/28/02 - 1/21/14
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
Appropriate reading for today:
"Love is a universal power that has been called by many the supreme Good. The greatest teaching of Jesus was Love. He taught us to love one another - to love not only those who love us, but our enemies as well, even those who would hurt us. It is in these latter instances where we meet one of the most difficult challenges of life.
There is a conditioned human tendency to react with anger when we feel hurt. Our first impulse may be to say or do something hurtful in return, to retaliate. However, we learn as we evolve on the spiritual path that a reaction at the same level of the provocation can never be truly helpful or healing. We learn that only love can heal. When we remain centered in the knowledge that, as divine beings, Love is our true essence, we are guided not to react in anger but instead to allow the healing power of Love to express through us. In this way, we rise beyond discord and strife. We transcend disharmony.
Love renews and harmonizes. It uplifts and overcomes, and it brings forth the highest and best in each of us. To love is to expand into a life of greater paces, prosperity, and freedom. The universal power of Love always heals." ~Kathy Juline
Happy New Year! May the power of Love light your path and mine as we journey through our lives this 2014.
"Love is a universal power that has been called by many the supreme Good. The greatest teaching of Jesus was Love. He taught us to love one another - to love not only those who love us, but our enemies as well, even those who would hurt us. It is in these latter instances where we meet one of the most difficult challenges of life.
There is a conditioned human tendency to react with anger when we feel hurt. Our first impulse may be to say or do something hurtful in return, to retaliate. However, we learn as we evolve on the spiritual path that a reaction at the same level of the provocation can never be truly helpful or healing. We learn that only love can heal. When we remain centered in the knowledge that, as divine beings, Love is our true essence, we are guided not to react in anger but instead to allow the healing power of Love to express through us. In this way, we rise beyond discord and strife. We transcend disharmony.
Love renews and harmonizes. It uplifts and overcomes, and it brings forth the highest and best in each of us. To love is to expand into a life of greater paces, prosperity, and freedom. The universal power of Love always heals." ~Kathy Juline
Happy New Year! May the power of Love light your path and mine as we journey through our lives this 2014.
Wednesday, December 25, 2013
Christmas redefined. This holiday has brought its hardships to me but I was tasked to redefine it and I think I've accomplished the mission. Had a gorgeous pre-dawn run and now I'm ready to enjoy the day with my mini-me and the family. Wishing all a day full of peace and love, no matter what religion you are or aren't.
Namaste.
Namaste.
Saturday, December 21, 2013
Wednesday, December 11, 2013
The death of a co-worker's young husband. Events like these cause me to reflect fairly deeply in to my own life. While I know it's nearly impossible to live everyday as if it is your last, it is quite possible and much easier to let go of pain to live more fully in the present.
I have been through a lot in the past three years and in the end, the only person I have yet to forgive is myself. It wreaks havoc on me physically at times and I know that in order to more effectively live my life, I have to let go of some things. However, I still find the "how" of forgiving myself somewhat difficult.
What I must remember is that when my time comes to leave my physical body (and that could be as soon as later tonight), I want the other halves of my most intimate relationships/friendships to be able to say she did well despite the circumstances. She lived, she learned, she adjusted, and she loved to very best of her ability. If I can make that happen, it will make my life well-lived.
My heart goes out to my co-worker and her young son. May the memories of their husband and father remain strong and positive despite his short life in this physical form.
I have been through a lot in the past three years and in the end, the only person I have yet to forgive is myself. It wreaks havoc on me physically at times and I know that in order to more effectively live my life, I have to let go of some things. However, I still find the "how" of forgiving myself somewhat difficult.
What I must remember is that when my time comes to leave my physical body (and that could be as soon as later tonight), I want the other halves of my most intimate relationships/friendships to be able to say she did well despite the circumstances. She lived, she learned, she adjusted, and she loved to very best of her ability. If I can make that happen, it will make my life well-lived.
My heart goes out to my co-worker and her young son. May the memories of their husband and father remain strong and positive despite his short life in this physical form.
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
From Science of Mind magazine (Kathy Juline) - these entries are inspiring to me...
"Whatever is or is not happening in your life right now is perfect. You are perfectly okay, regardless of how you are feeling or what you are now experiencing. Take this moment to relax into a surrendered attitude of just letting it all be okay. Settle into the peaceful awareness that nothing is truly the matter. You are alive, and just as you have arrived at where you are now, you will continue to arrive at where you will be tomorrow and the next day. For the present, you are in your perfect place, and you have done everything as well as you have known how to do or been able to do. You are not wrong or lacking. Everything is okay.
Spiritually, there is only perfection, and it is the truth of your life. Perfection means wholeness, and you are inseparable from wholeness. You are not, nor can you ever be, separate from universal unity and wholeness. Realize the truth about yourself and your life. If you experience any resistance to this realization, simply see this resistance as an old, limiting habit and release it.
As you enter fully into an acceptance of the now moment as essentially perfect, you discover a spacious freedom to continue to evolve. A deeply felt awareness of your oneness arises. Right now, everything is perfect in your life, and all is in divine order."
~~~~
"You are alive because you are an essential part of the whole of creation. You are here to bring forth the fullest expression of your true self, and the universe supports you completely in the process of fulfilling that which you have been called here to do and be. Anything and everything that has occurred in your life serves you in this unfolding process. Nothing has gone wrong nor in any way can you be prevented from attaining fulfillment. No matter what may have happened in your life, you are still and always an expression of perfect being, inseparably connected with the whole.
Your journey along the path of spiritual awakening may follow a course with many turns and twists, but you are moving forward with each new experience. Along this journey, you are becoming more deeply conscious of a Presence guiding and directing your steps and of a Power making and remaking your next experience. As you go forward, the way is made straight before you, and the path ahead of you unfolds with increasing joy, peace, and aliveness.
Sensing that deep, true inner self, which is you divine nature more fully expressing, you know that you are at home in the Universe, at home in the oneness of the whole. You are here to call forth the highest that is within you, and it is always there, ready and waiting to be called."
"Whatever is or is not happening in your life right now is perfect. You are perfectly okay, regardless of how you are feeling or what you are now experiencing. Take this moment to relax into a surrendered attitude of just letting it all be okay. Settle into the peaceful awareness that nothing is truly the matter. You are alive, and just as you have arrived at where you are now, you will continue to arrive at where you will be tomorrow and the next day. For the present, you are in your perfect place, and you have done everything as well as you have known how to do or been able to do. You are not wrong or lacking. Everything is okay.
Spiritually, there is only perfection, and it is the truth of your life. Perfection means wholeness, and you are inseparable from wholeness. You are not, nor can you ever be, separate from universal unity and wholeness. Realize the truth about yourself and your life. If you experience any resistance to this realization, simply see this resistance as an old, limiting habit and release it.
As you enter fully into an acceptance of the now moment as essentially perfect, you discover a spacious freedom to continue to evolve. A deeply felt awareness of your oneness arises. Right now, everything is perfect in your life, and all is in divine order."
~~~~
"You are alive because you are an essential part of the whole of creation. You are here to bring forth the fullest expression of your true self, and the universe supports you completely in the process of fulfilling that which you have been called here to do and be. Anything and everything that has occurred in your life serves you in this unfolding process. Nothing has gone wrong nor in any way can you be prevented from attaining fulfillment. No matter what may have happened in your life, you are still and always an expression of perfect being, inseparably connected with the whole.
Your journey along the path of spiritual awakening may follow a course with many turns and twists, but you are moving forward with each new experience. Along this journey, you are becoming more deeply conscious of a Presence guiding and directing your steps and of a Power making and remaking your next experience. As you go forward, the way is made straight before you, and the path ahead of you unfolds with increasing joy, peace, and aliveness.
Sensing that deep, true inner self, which is you divine nature more fully expressing, you know that you are at home in the Universe, at home in the oneness of the whole. You are here to call forth the highest that is within you, and it is always there, ready and waiting to be called."
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